Tuesday 3 November 2009

The Quagmire In The English Channels


After our horrific Virgin Media ordeal, today at dawn came a bright new Sky. Sorry. That's terrible. Pretend I didn't say it.

So, anyway, we had our shiny new HD box delivered today and have spent the day (inbetween working, doctors appointments and the odd visit to Rumpton (see below) surfing the 500 channels suddenly at our disposal.

Now for the vast majority of households, this isn't going to come as a revelation - but for us cable types, with our 165, it's all bit a bit of a shock.

That said, how many MORE channels will actually get watched round here? I mean, sure, it's quite interesting to see a Russian perspective on rolling news, and the arrival of NME TV in our lives is quite exciting. But... Nigerian Cinema? A channel devoted to Ocean Finance? And pages and pages of softist of the softcore porn (largely made up of one-brain-cell-short-of-a-coffee-table babes, wrything uncomfortably to the sound of library music, their chavvy babble only audible by premium rate callers sitting in dingy bedsits with a packet of Wotsits and a sock)?

And then there's the HD content. Suddenly leaping from 6 HD streams to nearly 20 (we don't have the movie channels. we haven't seen Slumdog Millionaire yet) is a boost. Except that... there's aaaaabsolutely nothing on. Proper nothing. Well, not this week, anyway. Roll on Dexter season, I say.

I went to program the Sky+ and 90% of what I found to watch was The Simpsons. And much as I love the little yelleh' tykes, that's pretty sad.


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